I was pretty sure that during this pregnancy, my brain would be mush- like it had been the two other times I was pregnant. My husband is particularly amused by this brain-drain, because coming up with simple phrases or trying to think of a certain word is absolutely impossible at this time. My sentences usually end up grammatically lacking, to say the least. To which my husband's oft reply is, "Way to speak, there, English Degree."
So, I don't expect anything I have to say to be said well. I was hoping I wouldn't have anything to say- er, God wouldn't have anything for me to say, but I guess He does. Luckily, it's variations on the same theme.
I'm very much convinced I sound like a complete lunatic to some people- especially my inlaws because they hear it the most, but, whenever people talk about the future in certain terms- you know, they use words like "a couple years down the road..." etc., well, it is hard for me to not say something crazy-sounding.
For instance, talking about saving money so we can send our boys to private school, my reply would be something along the lines of: "Yeah, that's assuming money is going to be worth anything by that time, or that there will be a functioning school system to actually send the boys to..."
Another example? We may buy this house and look into fixing it up "down the road". My immediate thought is, "Yeah, if we aren't too busy trying to find food and just, well, survive...then maybe we can talk about that fancy stone backsplash in the kitchen."
So, I am the crazy-haired lady that stands in the square with a cat perched atop her shoulders, babbling nonsense and hysteria. Except that, I don't think I am. I wish I was. Seriously. I want that stone backsplash in my possible kitchen. I want my kids to go to private school and listen to Christian music on their ipods.
But, I have a sickening, but very real feeling that reality is about to shift for Americans. And we can't even fathom it.
I was reading Joel, an OT prophet. He gives Israel the what-for after locusts eat pretty much everything they have. I have the Message version at the moment, so I don't know how much I am understanding, but this is what I am understanding: Joel pretty much says, "Duh, people. You thought you were invincible and here comes a bunch of bugs that destroy your very existence." 1:5-7 says "Sober up, you drunks! Get in touch with reality- and weep!" He goes on in 1:12ish "...joy is dried up and withered in the hearts of the people." Boy, do I see that on our horizon.
Joel goes on to talk about the temple, and how it is empty and lifeless. Nobody is praying, singing, etc. That right there- that is my fear. I can see a correlation today- the church in America is full of numbers- full of people doing stuff, interacting, studying the Bible and singing worship songs, but the amount of spiritual nothingness that exists within all that...I am terrified of that.
Because, when this hammer falls, those numbers will just fade into the rest of the pitiful, despairing numbers- and what will become of the real church? In America, at least?
This is where I feel my voice rise like a roll of thunder- and not so much my voice, but the voice God will give me.
"It is time to GET REAL. We will no longer be God's People in name only- we will BE His people, living it out with the Spirit coming off of us like bright blue flame that no one will be able to resist."
2:13-14 "Change your life, not just your clothes. Come back to God, your God. And here's why: God is kind and merciful. He takes a deep breath, puts up with a lot, This most patient God, extravagant in love, always ready to cancel catastrophe. Who knows? Maybe he'll do it now, maybe he'll turn around and show pity. Maybe, when all's said and done, there'll be blessings full and robust for your God!"
That is the key for the Christians of this messed up nation. We will be down, but it will be our choice whether or not we are out. Let us remember who our God is! He is our supply, our refuge, our hiding place. Always! Learn that NOW because the shock to your system will be a great one!
I'm not trying to be crazy freak person hyping you all up and scaring people. But I am saying Get Ready, and Get Ready by fortifying yourself with GOD and GOD alone. Realize NOW that there is NOTHING ELSE- before there really is nothing.
2:18-20 "At that, God went into action to get his land back. He took pity on his people. God answere and spoke to his people, "Look, listen- I'm sending a gift: Grain and wine and olive oil. The fast is over- eat your fill! I won't expose you any longer to contempt among the pagans. I'll head off the final enemy coming out of the north and dump them in a wasteland."
Is 41:10 "Do not fear, for I am with you. Do not despair, FOR I AM YOUR GOD."
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Cirque de Emotion`al
I very much enjoy driving in the car by myself. I rarely have the opportunity, but because my husband has been working til 9pm at That Fish Place, I get to go pick him up, and the boys don't come along because they are (hopefully) asleep by this time.
So, usually, I get to sing my guts out for a good 15 minutes. The other day, I was listening to the radio instead of my normal excellent choice of cd. Some weird song came on by a rapper guy who sounded like Eminem, and in fact, his song was a sort-of musical letter to Slim Shady himself. The rapper in the song was reaching out to Eminem- a multi-platinum, millionaire, hard-core rap artist. Wow.
The song was ok, and I was just listening calmly until I heard one line. I don't remember it verbatim, but it kinda went like this, "Most Christians automatically turn their nose up at you, think you're a lost cause, not worth the effort, when in reality they should be on their knees with broken hearts praying out their guts for you."
Literally, when I heard that, (and I'm really glad I was alone in the car) a huge, monstrous, alien-sounding sob came out of my face. Still, thinking about it, there's a lump.
Now, I would presume myself to be one of those nose-thumbers, and not very compassionate for rich, stupid famous people. Like Oprah. I want to kick her in the face most days. I can't explain why I reacted to that obvious Truth with a capital T in the way I did. It had to be the Spirit smacking my soul into realization.
Everybody needs Jesus. Even Oprah, even Tom Cruise, even Barack Obama. Every person living a life without Christ is a tragedy, even if it doesn't look like it at the moment. They may have everything on this Earth- power, money, debatable good looks, and adoring fans- but what is any of that if you are losing your very soul? If somebody is living their life without Christ, they are LOST and need to be FOUND.
Christians need to stop pretending like we get to decide who is worthy of being saved- as if it's our choice and not God's. We can't go around saying, "I'm not going to waste my time telling that person about Christ because it's pretty obvious that they are not going to come around."
Um, who do you think you are, or more importantly, who do you think our God is? Is He not fully capable of bringing ANYONE He wants to Him? He never specified that we should use our own judgement when it comes to telling the Good News.
Now, I know that there is a time to "dust off our sandals" and all that. But, how many Christians are there in this world? And if one decides to dust off his sandals, do all the others do the same, or do they give it a go themselves? I just don't know, kids. Christ never gave up on me, perhaps I should extend the same optimism and hope to everyone else I meet.
Perhaps, if I ever meet Oprah, I should refrain from pulling out her weave and smacking her in the face with one of her horrible Book Club selections. I mean, sure, I'll feel better for a brief second, until I realize that I just gave Oprah a heaping helping of exactly what a Christian shouldn't be. Compassion, understanding. Always hopeful. Always expecting, trusting. This is our part of the construction of the Kingdom- we have no business choosing the materials.
So, usually, I get to sing my guts out for a good 15 minutes. The other day, I was listening to the radio instead of my normal excellent choice of cd. Some weird song came on by a rapper guy who sounded like Eminem, and in fact, his song was a sort-of musical letter to Slim Shady himself. The rapper in the song was reaching out to Eminem- a multi-platinum, millionaire, hard-core rap artist. Wow.
The song was ok, and I was just listening calmly until I heard one line. I don't remember it verbatim, but it kinda went like this, "Most Christians automatically turn their nose up at you, think you're a lost cause, not worth the effort, when in reality they should be on their knees with broken hearts praying out their guts for you."
Literally, when I heard that, (and I'm really glad I was alone in the car) a huge, monstrous, alien-sounding sob came out of my face. Still, thinking about it, there's a lump.
Now, I would presume myself to be one of those nose-thumbers, and not very compassionate for rich, stupid famous people. Like Oprah. I want to kick her in the face most days. I can't explain why I reacted to that obvious Truth with a capital T in the way I did. It had to be the Spirit smacking my soul into realization.
Everybody needs Jesus. Even Oprah, even Tom Cruise, even Barack Obama. Every person living a life without Christ is a tragedy, even if it doesn't look like it at the moment. They may have everything on this Earth- power, money, debatable good looks, and adoring fans- but what is any of that if you are losing your very soul? If somebody is living their life without Christ, they are LOST and need to be FOUND.
Christians need to stop pretending like we get to decide who is worthy of being saved- as if it's our choice and not God's. We can't go around saying, "I'm not going to waste my time telling that person about Christ because it's pretty obvious that they are not going to come around."
Um, who do you think you are, or more importantly, who do you think our God is? Is He not fully capable of bringing ANYONE He wants to Him? He never specified that we should use our own judgement when it comes to telling the Good News.
Now, I know that there is a time to "dust off our sandals" and all that. But, how many Christians are there in this world? And if one decides to dust off his sandals, do all the others do the same, or do they give it a go themselves? I just don't know, kids. Christ never gave up on me, perhaps I should extend the same optimism and hope to everyone else I meet.
Perhaps, if I ever meet Oprah, I should refrain from pulling out her weave and smacking her in the face with one of her horrible Book Club selections. I mean, sure, I'll feel better for a brief second, until I realize that I just gave Oprah a heaping helping of exactly what a Christian shouldn't be. Compassion, understanding. Always hopeful. Always expecting, trusting. This is our part of the construction of the Kingdom- we have no business choosing the materials.
Monday, May 4, 2009
Something is definitely creating a very suspicious odor 'round here...
In addition, the Department of Homeland Security has established an outline of how BATF, FBI, and U.S. Marshals will be called upon to impose mandatory quarantines in the event of a widespread swine flu outbreak in the U.S. Under executive order 13375, if citizens attempt to free themselves from “involuntary isolation” they will be subject to a $250,000 fine and one year in jail.
That little blurb right there is from an article on an "alternative" news site. (A news site that you take with a grain of salt, because a lot of it could be crazy-talk.)
Because I am a pregnant woman who will need a cesarian, and becaues I have two young children, I try to pay attention to stuff like this. Not to be a nut-ball paranoid freak (that happens naturally) but because I want to lessen the shock and be able to make a move. Fortified in Christ, ready to march as He tells me.
I don't like this stuff. I would prefer it all be crazy-foil-hat-wearing nutball talk. But certain things...I'm not going to take lightly. Be aware of this stuff. And do not think we are immune to this insanity. Nobody wants to be the generation to live through terror and unthinkable junk like this. But eyes open, folks. Eyes open, and hearts attached to Christ. He ain't called The Rock for nothin'.
That little blurb right there is from an article on an "alternative" news site. (A news site that you take with a grain of salt, because a lot of it could be crazy-talk.)
Because I am a pregnant woman who will need a cesarian, and becaues I have two young children, I try to pay attention to stuff like this. Not to be a nut-ball paranoid freak (that happens naturally) but because I want to lessen the shock and be able to make a move. Fortified in Christ, ready to march as He tells me.
I don't like this stuff. I would prefer it all be crazy-foil-hat-wearing nutball talk. But certain things...I'm not going to take lightly. Be aware of this stuff. And do not think we are immune to this insanity. Nobody wants to be the generation to live through terror and unthinkable junk like this. But eyes open, folks. Eyes open, and hearts attached to Christ. He ain't called The Rock for nothin'.
Legitimate Faith?
I know those two words together make people squirm. And I know the word 'faith' is just thrown all over the place and means all sorts of things to different people. People have faith, practice faith, rely on faith...it's one of those buzz words. Works in lots of situations and gets you out of any more questions or whatever. It's a don't touch word.
I'm touchin' it. I've been wrestling with the word and concept and whatever else for a good many months now, and I've kinda set it aside to concentrate on, well, the baby barfies and the whole exhuastion-from-providing-raw-material-for-God-to-make-a-whole-person-within-me thing. But I'm back on it like fleas on a hounddog.
My brother posted something on facebook the other day that just floored me. It wasn't so much what he wrote, but the train of thought my brain took just from his little comment. He wanted to go to church more and be a good Christian.
Ok, first, frequency of church attendance does not equal good Christian. What does equal good Christian? Does that even exist?? If Jesus rebuked somebody for calling Him good (no one is good but the Father)- how we gonna be callin' a Christian good? Ok, yeah, good in the world's terms. No, we don't measure by the world's terms!
What are we trying to do here, folks? What is our mission, what is our goal? What do we stand for? What moves us? What makes us different? Why will Christ recognize us when He snatches us up like a thief in the night?
Faith, right? What an infuriatingly abstract and bizarre thing. How do we even begin to measure it? Is it something to measure? I tell you, this thought train keeps me chugging for hours, and I know if I start to go in this direction around 9pm, I am doomed for the night. There is just so much to think about and ponder and inquire to God about. How about some clarity, there, Lord?
Ok, so I do have some valuable words about faith. Maybe. I think that the more a person talks about faith- the more they use that word, just throw it around and spice up their sentences here and there with the old faith word, well, I will purse my lips and furrow my brow in their general direction. I don't want to hear about your faith. I want to SEE it. Maybe that's just me, but I do believe there is a lot of evidence in the Bible for visible faith rather than lip service faith.
If faith is what saves us, if it is what gets us through the tough parts, if it is what connects us to our Lord- must we not be compelled to LIVE it? Faith should move us into action, not sit us in pews or in a cute little coffee shop with red-letter Bibles in hip-colored leather Bible-totes with our CS Lewis bookmarks. I mean, there is probably nothing wrong with that, but if that is your faith- if that is how you show the world you are a Christian, um, what?
Now, I write this, and I'm not even really good at what I'm trying to say.
Faith plugs us into the Spirit, to our Lord. The electricity that flows from the Spirit should energize us and shove us forward into a life that resembles Christ's. And this isn't new stuff. You will find God imploring people in all the books of the Prophets, all throughout the OT- help the poor, help the widows, help the Least of These. Our faith points us in the direction of what is important and what our focus should be.
So, look at your faith. What does it tell the world? Does it tell the world that you hang out with Christians, go to a church regularly, study the Bible, live your life with integrity? But is that all? Jesus hung out with his followers, went to Synegogue often, read the scriptures, and definitely lived His life with integrity. But if I'm not mistaken, the bulk of the gospel is about Him healing, helping, feeding, comforting...
So, this faith thing. What are we doing about it? What does it look like to God? Because that is where its gonna matter.
I'm touchin' it. I've been wrestling with the word and concept and whatever else for a good many months now, and I've kinda set it aside to concentrate on, well, the baby barfies and the whole exhuastion-from-providing-raw-material-for-God-to-make-a-whole-person-within-me thing. But I'm back on it like fleas on a hounddog.
My brother posted something on facebook the other day that just floored me. It wasn't so much what he wrote, but the train of thought my brain took just from his little comment. He wanted to go to church more and be a good Christian.
Ok, first, frequency of church attendance does not equal good Christian. What does equal good Christian? Does that even exist?? If Jesus rebuked somebody for calling Him good (no one is good but the Father)- how we gonna be callin' a Christian good? Ok, yeah, good in the world's terms. No, we don't measure by the world's terms!
What are we trying to do here, folks? What is our mission, what is our goal? What do we stand for? What moves us? What makes us different? Why will Christ recognize us when He snatches us up like a thief in the night?
Faith, right? What an infuriatingly abstract and bizarre thing. How do we even begin to measure it? Is it something to measure? I tell you, this thought train keeps me chugging for hours, and I know if I start to go in this direction around 9pm, I am doomed for the night. There is just so much to think about and ponder and inquire to God about. How about some clarity, there, Lord?
Ok, so I do have some valuable words about faith. Maybe. I think that the more a person talks about faith- the more they use that word, just throw it around and spice up their sentences here and there with the old faith word, well, I will purse my lips and furrow my brow in their general direction. I don't want to hear about your faith. I want to SEE it. Maybe that's just me, but I do believe there is a lot of evidence in the Bible for visible faith rather than lip service faith.
If faith is what saves us, if it is what gets us through the tough parts, if it is what connects us to our Lord- must we not be compelled to LIVE it? Faith should move us into action, not sit us in pews or in a cute little coffee shop with red-letter Bibles in hip-colored leather Bible-totes with our CS Lewis bookmarks. I mean, there is probably nothing wrong with that, but if that is your faith- if that is how you show the world you are a Christian, um, what?
Now, I write this, and I'm not even really good at what I'm trying to say.
Faith plugs us into the Spirit, to our Lord. The electricity that flows from the Spirit should energize us and shove us forward into a life that resembles Christ's. And this isn't new stuff. You will find God imploring people in all the books of the Prophets, all throughout the OT- help the poor, help the widows, help the Least of These. Our faith points us in the direction of what is important and what our focus should be.
So, look at your faith. What does it tell the world? Does it tell the world that you hang out with Christians, go to a church regularly, study the Bible, live your life with integrity? But is that all? Jesus hung out with his followers, went to Synegogue often, read the scriptures, and definitely lived His life with integrity. But if I'm not mistaken, the bulk of the gospel is about Him healing, helping, feeding, comforting...
So, this faith thing. What are we doing about it? What does it look like to God? Because that is where its gonna matter.
Saturday, May 2, 2009
Bait and Switch
I can barely contain my head when I hear this insanity on the TV, or from regular people I see in the flesh. I don't know why my reaction is so strong, why I want to scream and smash the TV screen. Well, maybe I have an inkling, but maybe I don't.
This flu thing is off the charrrrrrrrrrrrrrrt. How spoon-fed are we that we can sit there and watch the media talking heads work themselves into hysterics over a few hundred flu deaths? And then talk about this flu like it's descending upon us like some horrible plague??? Are we seriously going in that direction? Is this hysteria not just something we are being told to buy into?
I just don't get it. The masks, the constant spin they put on the truth so that it sounds like more of a "big deal" when, really, it's not. The big deal is what lies beneath.
Mexico City is in lock-down. The flu is not that big a deal, but it sure is a fine way to wrangle the populace into submission. And the way the newsmedia seems to be able to pull our strings, well, we're just makin' it extra easy for 'em, now aren't we?
Now, I know I am highly paranoid. I know I trust the govt' about as much as a shop-a-holic in the bargain bin. But it's just weird. This whole thing. It's scary and strange and just has a bad taste all about it. It's probably, in the long run, just one more nail in our coffin. We're not in the ground yet, but they're gettin' us ready for it.
Ugh, God, this is whacked out and annoying. I await your hammer, Lord. Just smack it down already and redeem us, restore us to you. It's gonna hurt, but the pain is our great gain. To be desperate- but desperate for You, Lord. Finally, and truly. I shudder in fear, anticipation. Let me trust You, please! I know Your glory will come from all of this. Let it be to all of us as you will say, Lord!!
This flu thing is off the charrrrrrrrrrrrrrrt. How spoon-fed are we that we can sit there and watch the media talking heads work themselves into hysterics over a few hundred flu deaths? And then talk about this flu like it's descending upon us like some horrible plague??? Are we seriously going in that direction? Is this hysteria not just something we are being told to buy into?
I just don't get it. The masks, the constant spin they put on the truth so that it sounds like more of a "big deal" when, really, it's not. The big deal is what lies beneath.
Mexico City is in lock-down. The flu is not that big a deal, but it sure is a fine way to wrangle the populace into submission. And the way the newsmedia seems to be able to pull our strings, well, we're just makin' it extra easy for 'em, now aren't we?
Now, I know I am highly paranoid. I know I trust the govt' about as much as a shop-a-holic in the bargain bin. But it's just weird. This whole thing. It's scary and strange and just has a bad taste all about it. It's probably, in the long run, just one more nail in our coffin. We're not in the ground yet, but they're gettin' us ready for it.
Ugh, God, this is whacked out and annoying. I await your hammer, Lord. Just smack it down already and redeem us, restore us to you. It's gonna hurt, but the pain is our great gain. To be desperate- but desperate for You, Lord. Finally, and truly. I shudder in fear, anticipation. Let me trust You, please! I know Your glory will come from all of this. Let it be to all of us as you will say, Lord!!
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